well I sent an email and this is what it said Should I've or not
This morning talking to him in this Arguement I thought what you guys had written so I sent it to him. We will see the reaction. I couldn't tell you what it will be. He called while ago and ask if I still wanted to chew his A$$ somemore.
I have this and decided this is me and what I need to do. I am going to focus on myself and positive thoughts and see what life will bring. I some times have those moments like I did this morning but it is out of selfishness and hurt that I do those things and I just need to accept it and keep my head up and moving forward. Like Napoleon Hill says it is the worst of the fears “Loss of Love”. But I have to learn to accept it. And face it like he said you have to learn to “Get a Long Without Love.” It is a struggle but I will survive and I don’t consider my self a victim. But sometimes you fall into a category and need to change chapters. I will change chapters and move ahead. A giving pleasing personality has me playing tug a war within my self. I found this interesting and thought I would just send this to you because I guess this is what you have been trying to tell me. I just need to be hit with a 2x4 for it to soak in. Thanks for the help. Luv ya always Pen
Why?? What if?? Yes, but... I can't... I'll try...
Why??
The main reason most of us ask why is because we believe with a little more knowledge and a few more details, we can "control" the situation and or person. Asking "why" only wastes our energy - it rarely changes anything.
What if??
What if's keep us from living in the reality of the moment and also keep us from admitting we are powerless. When we are in the past with the "whys" and the future with the "what ifs" we loose today. Today is the only day we have.
Yes, but...
When we "yes but.." we are not listening to what others have to say. We are being self centered and self absorbed, and in essence saying we are so unique that what has worked for countless others will not work in our situation. Each time we "yes but" we are cooking up excuses inside our heads and our minds are closed.
I can't..
This is our biggest lie to ourselves. The truth is not that we can't, but that we won't. It is where we let fear have control over our lives.
I'll try.
The saying, "to try is to lie" refers to how easily we fall into making excuses. If we say, "I'll try" we lack commitment. "I'll try" allows us to bide our time while looking for an excuse not to do whatever we have said we'll try.
H.O.W.
HOW do we detach?
H - Honesty with ourselves and others.
O - Openness to hearing new ideas and breaking old ways of thinking and behaving.
W - Willingness to take risks and try something different.
Detaching with love does not mean that we stop caring. It simply means that we quit trying to control someone else and their behavior. We stop creating comfortable environments for unacceptable behavior. We stop lying to ourselves, we accept the reality of who the person is instead of focusing on who they "could" be.
Letting Go
To let go doesn’t mean to stop caring; it means I can’t do it for someone else.
To let go is not to cut myself off; it is the realization that I can’t control another.
To let go is not to enable, but to allow learning from natural consequences.
To let go is to admit powerlessness, which means the outcome is not in my hands.
To let go is not to try to change or blame another; I can only change myself.
To let go is not to care for, but to care about.
To let go is not to fix, but to be supportive.
To let go is not to judge, but allow another to be a human being.
To let go is not to be in the middle arranging all the outcomes, but to allow others to effect their own outcomes.
To let go is not to be protective; it is to permit another to face reality.
To let go is not to deny, but to accept.
To let go is not to nag, scold, or argue, but to search out my own shortcomings and correct them.
To let go is not to adjust everything to my desires, but to take each day as it comes, and to cherish the moment.
To let go is not to criticize and regulate anyone, but to try to become what I dream I can be.
To let go is not to regret the past, but to grow and live for the future.
