Whenever I'm visualising H and OW I use a technique I found in a Paul McKenna book called whiteout. You imagine the picture/sound as if it were on a tv screen where you can adjust the picture until all you get is a white screen or white noise. Believe me- the more you do it, the more it works.
You must also learn to ignore her 'looks' and keep working on your PMA. Act as if everything is ok. This will puzzle her because it's not what she expects you to do. My H recently said I was having too much fun and he expected me to be depressed. He is cross because I'm not doing what he expects. I'm not really having that much fun and I am depressed but I sure as hell don't want him to know that. I want to be a strong, independent and attractive woman so that he thinks about what he might be missing if he goes. It's hard and it hurts and sometimes I just scream and cry (when he's out).
Because he was so cross I realise he does care what I think and feel. This is a real boost to my PMA. At the moment I'm living with the thought that he'll move out any day now and it's absolutely no way to live. However, if he does go, it will be with the knowledge that he's leaving an attractive, stong, independent woman behind. If I become a basket case it will make him feel better because that's what he expects.
