Hard to believe you can get a D and not even have to show up for it. You can't even close on real estate that way! Something is way wrong with that.
Unfortunately, the courts would be back-logged but maybe there would be more marriages saved. Too bad that there is more worth put on real-estate than on human beings.
Where I live, as long as you are S for 1 year, and a request for a D is made, it will be granted unless you have reason to contest it. You can't even say, I won't sign. It doesn't even matter.
Hey Jeff, have you visited the top of the mountain this year. I remember, you helping me up there along with BBA. Update?
Hey BBA, How are you? I can't seem to find your thread. I want to know that you are doing great.
ISLH
Me: 49 - S22 & S26 H: 41 - No kids M: 10/00 Bomb New Year's Day 2006 H living w OW 01/07; have baby 12/07 D final 07/07 Thread #9 - Hope Lives On
Maybe it is time for an update. But there is nothing to update really. Been over 100 degrees each day for the past two weeks. Uggg.
I am busy at work and that keeps my mind off things. But just below the surface I still feel wounded and stuck. A good friend sent me this:
"Hey my friend....
Been thinking about you a lot this past week as I crossed a series of "milestones"....something I've realized, Jeff, is that it's okay to feel "hurt"....to feel that longing for "validation" and recognition that we ARE working our asses off in a horrible situation....we feel so ashamed over everything - and even moreso that we're still feeling instead of running around all happy happy happy like the books all say we "should".
Bottom line - it hurts. Deeply. And we're allowed to feel it.
And I too have problems "letting go"....I'm not sure it's xW I want as much as being married - as having my identity back as a man, father, husband - that is what was taken away from us - and when our ex wives refuse to even give us the slightest bit of acknowledgement, it hurts all the worse - and it is OKAY that we feel this....."
That is how I feel. My life has been ripped from me and it hurts.
Wow! WOW! Man-oh-Man all I could keep thinking while reading your post was "Me Too!"
ME TOO!!!!
DonH Midwest Me 56 WAW-EXW 55 Met 11/95 / Married 5/00 Bomb 6/20/05 / She Filed on 6/2/06 / Divorced on 10/9/06 4 who'd qualify as GF since D & dated about 25 women since D
Jeff, it's okay to hurt and feel ripped apart. You have to process those feelings to put them away. What you should not do is wallow around in them until you get bitter and hard against the world. Find a way up and out. Prescription drugs or therapy might be the answer. OTC drugs or herbs might help. Mostly IMO you need to do something other than go to work and go to your apartment. Interact with people in the real world. Send a smile to the checkout people, hold the door for someone at the grocery store, say good job to the ref at the kids games. Start small like that if you are afraid of being hurt again. There are many good people that would be happy to have you send a smile their way and you don't even know them.
What's the status of getting your place back?
Live your life while you are still living. Riding the trail less traveled.
