I can not figure out how she is feeling or thinks at all anymore. We go through this pattern were things are alright, we are talking, no real R talk, then bam, she calls and is totally distraught and wants to come back. By the time she comes by to talk about it, she is is a screw you attitude and I just take another hit to the gut. It also appears these highs and lows of hers are happening closer together and with greater emotional intensity. Her break downs are major sobing sessions, and her screw you attitude is very cold.
It all seems to be from guilt and lonliness. No one is with her anymore, everyone surrounding her is new and the few old friends and family that were around her are now avoiding her.
I feel bad for her, but I'm really getting detached and starting to think I could do so much better. What really made me mad last night was we talked about S, and she asked why I hadn't brought it up before. I told her that when I did she claimed manipulation on my part. Then she asked about his behavior and I told her about the claming up and such. She had the nerve to say, well he doesn't do it with me, so that is your problem. Oh I see, our S's problems are going to be the responsibility of the parent that is with him. Why this total lack of care for him, all I can think is she thinks I'm lying about it. If she doesn't think I am lying then she is a very cold and horrible person who doesn't care about her S.
Just sucks to be going through this. No matter what though, this is still her D and she has to deal with it. I'm going to pull back and let her drive, leave her be and let it run its course.
