I know the answers seem like they should be outside of us, but everything you need is already inside of you. The equipment to deal with it is inside of you. H can't do a thing...our brains are trained to look outside of ourselves to blame so we don't have to take on the hard thinking, but we have to be conscious and understand that until we deal with our thoughts inside of us, there will be no change.
I'm getting ready to take off for the day, but sometime between today and tomorrow I'll try to post some of the journaling strategies I used to help deal with the OW in my case. It was hard, but when I finally said ENOUGH and focused my attention on taking control of my life and my thoughts again instead of giving up my power to that whore (yeah, still don't like her...more work to do there *grin*), it happened.
Be gentle with yourself. Get physically active doing something--walking, shopping, talking on the phone to a friend, reading, etc.--when OW pops into your head.
I'll send you some strategies later tonight/early tomorrow....
SD
Me: 40 H: 43 H had EA from 2/06-9/06 Bomb 5/06 Piecing since 9/2006 3/2008: Boundary setting 7/2009: Boundary crossing~dropped my own bomb. 8/2010: Marriage finally on track!
