CVA - "Back in Shape"

[Not Much Left]

Thanks Mopo
No more Nomo, the "no" has to go!

Did you work out today? I did!

[Nomopo]

Thanks CVA. I appreciate the MoPo idea (SuperDad has been on the same kick before), but actually I prefer Nomo because (1) I think I have had an awakening and this is the new me (a new person - Nomo ), (2) even though the no was added for a different reason when I picked my name, I think the no is still right because I have left (or I am leaving) some bad characteristics behind and (3) there is a small chance W would see and recognize MoPo.

No workout today (yet).

Nomo


I still know your intentions were great, and I appreciate that!

[waw1978]

CVA & Nomo

Glad you can see where your W's are coming from in this particular area.

I know it can be a threat to see your W's get more independent but with your ongoing support it will make you shine in their eyes. Your W's need this and you both can help them along by offering words of encouragement and praise when they accomplish little milestones.

In your case Nomo, I can see why this has been a double-edged sword...But you are working on you, and together working on your R in JC...Hang in there. OM is just a bump in the long rocky road on your way to recovery.

[Not Much Left]

Nomo
I gotcha bro, I get it completely.

Thanks WAW, I really have always wanted my W to be fulfilled. She is a big girl, if she wants to do / try something, I am all for it. Just like w/ my jobs though, I would always expect (hopefully in the future) that as a couple, you talk about decisions that affect the family.

You agree w/ that?

Thanks again for the support

[Nomopo]

Thanks CVA.

WAW, thanks too. Our whole session this morning was on this issue, and I have learned a lot in the last few hours. A lot and it means a ton for my DB plan and efforts, so check out my journaling later today if you have time.

Nomo

[SuperDad]

CVA,
Nomo got in a hard 7 hour workout yesterday evening, so he deserves a break today

RE: Depression. Depression is a persistant state, being depressed is a response to a temporary situation. When I look back over the years, I often thought/knew that my W was depressed, but never thought about the possiblity that it was Depression with a cause all it's own and not in response to the sitch at the time. Now I see that there was always a reason/excuse for her to be depressed and in fact that the cause is almost certainly something much deeper which she needs to deal with (maybe physical- e.g. brain chemistry, maybe psychological - e.g. unresolved issues from her past, maybe both).

I would take a step back and see if she meets many/most of the indicators for depression listed in DR and then decide if this is a possibility. I think that mild depression is very easy to overlook as something else and it can be just as destructive over the long haul as severe depression.

For reference the symptoms DR lists are:

Changes in sleeping habits
Changes in eating habits
Lethargy
Loss of pleasure
Lack of motivation
Irritability
Loss of concentration/poor memory
Excessive crying
Apathy
Withdrawal
Thoughts of death or suicide
Loss of interest in sex

I think that your W has quite a few of these, which is why I thought of depression. My W has shown most of these (not death/suicide thankfully) for the better part of our marriage. I just never even considered depression because I always focussed on the (ever fewer) good times. In this case, being an optimist can eventually lead to denial.

I hope this isn't it, but I would take another look just to make sure.

SD

[waw1978]

Def agree with that CVA. Discussions and decisions should be made together regarding these ventures.

What got my M in trouble was my H's controlling ways. Its tough cause now when I start to think...Maybe we could be couple and make this work...I remember some dream of mine he stomped on (and there were a lot of them).