Mixed signals - catfan's continual saga part???

[Dom R]

ah, conflict avoider.
if thats the way she lives her life.. then you're in for a rough ride. or at least, a very frustrating one.
The fact that she wont face (and thus resolve) conflict, means she wont be willing to commit to any kind of plan, and any kind of confrontation about her unwillingness to do that... will just be avoided.


I dont think she was worried at all that "you were upset". I think she would be upset if you didnt "get the message", that she's not going to cooperate with you

This if you ask me is a classic example of why we need to go to something like retrouvaille. We have to learn how to communicate!

no, you dont need to learn to communicate. you need to learn how to problem-solve together. Those are technically two very separate skills.

I think perhaps that they teach both... but if she has decided she wont go, then there's nothing you can do about it.
She's probably going to do the same thing to any kind of "work on your marriage" suggestion that you bring up.
You're going to have to decide what you are going to do about that, if anything.