I agree with you DR, standing and detaching are about taking care of ourselves...I have gotten better at that over time.
By "truly gone", I just meant that I really don't think he will ever want to come back. I don't think his infatuation with OW will last, but it will take a long time and I think he would have to go the whole 9 yards (i.e. long R, living together, maybe even M) for him to get over her...and they haven't even start R yet. The other factor is his band...if they do well, then that opens up a whole bunch of new doors for him...new people, new places, new things, new girls. I honestly don't think that I/family life will ever measure up. I think he feels like we hold him back from his dreams...and there's nothing I can do about that. If the band doesn't do well then he will become very depressed...not to mention, if he decides he would want to come home after he tried everything else, that would make me feel like second best...an issue I have always had in our R. I don't know if I could handle that.
