It is the responsibility of BOTH spouses to speak each others LL with enthusiasim.
I do agree with NOPS, when your LL is PT, you have only ONE person that can speak this to you, which of course automatically puts all the pressure on that person and creates neediness. There is no suitable alternative to this.
What if he finds it too uncomfortable to participate in these activities? Should he try to confront his feelings about it? Yes. That is what Deida man's, confronts his fears.
And, do HD people typically consider PT their LL? Is that why they're HD? My guess is that it is pretty common. What I wonder is why people DON"T have this as their LL. It is so chemically addictive, not sure why people don't have this as their LL. I would guess that one common reason is that peoples bodies react differently to their ability to become addicted to the chemicals of physical touch.
What about meeting BOTH LL's at the same time? My wifes LL is WOA, so she fishes for complements by listing ALL the stuff she does everyday. She will even list everything for me, like somehow this will impress me. Now I appreciate everything she does, and I probably she give her more WOA for it. But at the same time, this is really not what I want from her. So there is this huge disconnect. I would probably give far more in WOA if the wife was actually doing something for me that I care about (not what she cares about). FOr example: Wife: I just did the Laundry, cleaned the bathrooms, made the beds (the pauses to wait for WOA). Husband: Well, that was nice (Thinking, I really don't want that, I want to spend the evening snuggling on the couch).
So we end up with the wife doing the WRONG stuff to et WOA, and then she is disappointed when she does not get WOA. I have even offered to do ALL the things my wife lists, and she turns me down. Soetimes I wonder if they dislike the sex stuff so much that they try to overcompensate by doing all this domestic stuff and expect us guys to give the WOA for this, thinking somehow this makes up for their lack of physical touch.
I guess what I am saying, is if your LL is WOA, then fish for compliments by doing things that your husband wants in his LL. This way boh spouses get what they want simultaneously. Or is there something in women that says that WOA must be given on what THEY consider to be important. Maybe WOA for being physical just don't count as much.
