I think it is perfect that you had that interaction today so that it sets that stage for having your talk on Thurs. It will kind of make the last stand talk seem not so out of the blue, you know?
I completely agree! I dare say it is almost like an act of Destiny the way today played out and set me up for the talk. My DB coach has said to look for moments that lend to the talk so it will not seem forced, and this seemed to be one of them. However, I think that you and the others are right that not bringing it up today was in my best interest. It really does give W more time to reflect on the changes I've made in my behaviors, as well as the positive interactions between us and what she is potentially giving up. Today we really did have the first comfortable talk since the separation. The more I think about it, more I think it showed some level of W's desire to get closer to me. Why else would she stick around just talking and enjoying herself after receiving the cell phone charm and note? It seems to me that she would've tried to avoid me or limit the interaction as much as possible if she didn't like the idea of the charm or if it made her feel uncomfortable. It just seems like some basic math here to me: showing change in behavior + thoughtfulness w/ charm = W lingering and having good talk. I hope I'm not getting overly optimistic, just to be shot down in a few days. I really think I'll get some good talk on Thursday that reveals W's acknowledgements of my changes and whatnot, but that ultimately I may get denied in postponing the D. Guess we'll see.
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It is really neat how things that you initially thought might have been negatives (raft trip, D's thumb), actually turned out to be great positives because of how well you handled them. Cool!
I couldn't agree more! In fact, I'm really happy that they happened now!
Hope all has been well with you -- I'll be checking in on your sitch sometime tomorrow, I believe. Can't wait to see you in a few days and put a face with a username!
