What you wrote about self-discipline and goals really hits home. I don't think I have any goals, long-term or otherwise that I believe in, so that would explain my lack of self-discipline. Sure, I have goals that I hope for, like improving my R, but I'm not much of a believer. Floundering sounds very familiar.
Don't forget that the hallmark of a type 4 is the constant searching for one's identity. If you're always searching for your identity, how can you ever know yourself well enough to believe in a goal? I don't know.
ETA: Keep us posted on you search for your bio family. I'm interested to hear what you find out.
