Husband, I have asked him on several occasions calmly. I asked him once, can you figure out how to tell me something without telling me something. In that instance, he had told me he was not going to be available, and made a point of telling me he was going to be with her. I told him, he could have just told me he was busy, and I would not have asked any further. He didn't need to volunteer that information. He agreed. Yet he is still doing it?
Today when he came over, it was as simple as he was picking up the air compressor. I asked if he had the other parts he would need for it, such as the adaptors etc, and he said, don't worry she does. Well he could have very easily, just said yes, thank you.
My therapist thinks I should sit down and tell him that I am not happy with what he is doing and that I do not accept it. But because of our children I have to not act as if it bothers me for the sake of them. I had tried that once before and he immediately became defensive and angry and accused me of the being the same "controlling, manipulative person" i have been for twelve years. I want to avoid that angry person, and I feel like what I have done so far has been some process, but I also many times feel like I am being walked all over, because I feel like he thinks I am ok with it.
My friend says I should write a letter, but I am so terrified of making the wrong move, that I just don't do anything?
I would love to hear what others have to think about this?
