NDDT- This might be a good point to write out some goals, ala DB.
Have you looked into going dark? I don't know much about it, but it sounds like it might be appropriate for your sitch.

me- 42
H- 51
married 11 years
D-9, S-9, D-3

bomb 4/07
h moved out 8/07
h moved back 4/08