sometimes we settle. We beleive it is all we deserve. We find ourselves lacking and are willing to take whatever we can get. Sometimes werun across people who see that in us and useusuntil we are empty.
I was that person. I was in an even more abusive situation that I left and almost immediately got involved with LSS. He said everything right and told me everything I wantedto hear, except the truth.
I dumbed myself down so he would feel smart. I sacraficed career opportunities so he could keep his job. I made excuses when money was missing and accepted responsibilty for thingsthat weren't mine. I loved the potential in the person he said he was. I didn't know the person he really was.
His mom can email me and his friends can email me but the difference is in ME this time.
One of my dear friends told me it hurt him to be around me sometimes becuase my self-esteem was so low. I talked to him a week ago andhe was laughing,notatwhat I said but at the different person I had become.
The new me doesn't NEED anyone.
The person I amwithnow is by choice, I didn't getinvolved with someone out of a NEED for anything. They don't complete me (like that detrimental sappy movieline) They add to me. They encourage me. They are my friend. My friends surrounding me encourage my health. They want me to grow and be strong all on my own. They want my light to shine.
They aremy gifts
Hellno I don't want LSS back Hellno I don't need his manipulative mother making excuses Hellno I don't need his married friends to send me naked pics of themselves
I am beyond that trash
So thank you all my beautiful friends, who saw my spark and fanned its flames
thank you to all my joyous friendswho encourage me to seek my happiness
thank you to all my friends who toldme,repeatedly,that I deserved more
you have all helped me find the "alive" inside of me.
