It's going to be a bumpy ride

[Trixi]

Would you like to repaint? Is the house in his name? How long is his lease for? Painting is relatively quick and easy to reverse.

It is both of ours' house, but I can't afford the mortgage, which means whichever way this turns out, he's coming back-in 6 months or less. For the most part, I like the paint colors in the bedroom(1 super dark red wall and the rest are sort of a brown mustardy color-we had a designer help us with color selections). If it were TOTALLY my house (forever) then I might go with a sage green or a camel brown.

I did pack up all of his stuff that was in the shower and by 'his' sink. There is no need for me to have it and it takes up valuable caddy real estate.

Morgan- I like your friend! She sounds like a hoot! and thank you for not making me feel like a total freak for not wanting to wash the pillow cases (yet). I wish bedding sets weren't so freaking expensive. Something we already agreed on was that I would get the bed he is using (queen size) and he would get the bed that I am currently using (king size), so I don't want to drop $200-250 on a set that I won't be taking with me.

I had a dream last night about a my H and a friend (very cute co-worker) of his from work. IRL, this friend would always "babysit" me at company functions while my H went and worked the room and basically left me to fend for myself. In the dream, once again, it was CW(co-worker) with me. There was a natural disaster on the horizon and H was off doing who knows what. CW and I (and somehow my mom ended up there) were trying to find safety and while doing that we talked some. He said that H has always fancied himself too much for just one woman. That H is crazy for leaving. We did continue to try to reach H, but he would just flit by and be gone. CW was tender and caring and never left. My mom, (who never really cares for the guys I like) gave him a huge thumbs up.

What was my point in sharing the dream? I guess it gave me some hope (albeit from my own head) that there could be someone else out there who would really REALLY care for me and not string me on; someone who would stand by me. Would I love it to be my H? Absolutely! But, he has been acting this way for so long, I don't know if he can find another way to 'be' with me.

Onward and upward- more sorting, cleaning and rearranging to do today.