I've used the "your loss" technique, and, while it might help soothe me, it does not change the outcome. The rest of the conversation seemed kind of stilted and artificial. Maybe the "bringing it back to his desire for her" is something I could work at a little better in the situation of "pillow talk", but generally, Ms.Hdog seems to ignore this kind of talk. She either doesn't respond or changes the subject.
The “your loss” technique does not work with my wife either. A person needs to feel s/he deserves something before s/he feels the loss of it. That is one of my wife’s problems. She complains of not getting enough validation, but when she does get it she sabotages it.
The part of the conversation I like was how the H stayed on target and did not allow the W to deflect, and she tried to do so many times. Think back to how often your W is able to deflect you in your talks. Just the other day you got upset with her on the phone, right? That was a successful deflection by her. She goaded you and you turned into the “bad” guy which justified her throwing up her walls and reinforcing her resentment toward you. This is the same strategy that Lil warned about, that your W might try to create some “emergency” to sabotage your trip. When you hold your ground and go anyway, you will be the “bad” guy for abandoning her in her time of need and she will be able to hold that over you for a long time. Prepare for this but do not change your plans.
