Living with my WAW 3

[SuperDad]

Journaling:
Well, my time here in Austin is good, but not great, since my W's PMA is non-existant. I think the fact that I am interfering with her time with OM is one part of it, but also the fact that she had to let her sis know that we don't share sleeping quarters any more probably is a contributor.

For my part, I have been nothing but upbeat. She took the kids with her to see an old friend of her's this morning. We then took the kids to a spring fed pool (brrr!) and out for snow cones. I invited W to come to dinner with me to see an old HS friend of ours (mostly mine) and his finance. She said she would rather not go and I responded with an upbeat "OK that's fine."

Tomorrow we are going to a great state park on a river near Austin. Afterwards, we will go to dinner with her siblings and our kids for my bday. I thought to invite W to go out afterwards to see a band or to the poetry slam that is going on here, but have decided against it. Instead I am going to another old friend's place to catch up. Maybe I will go out anyway afterwards.

We discussed our plans for the rest of the week. She suggested that I take the kids with me when I leave on Wed. (Obviously so she can get in some more time with OM.) I am doing it for three reasons
(1) She has to choose to pursue our R on her own, and me standing in the way of her and OM will only reduce the odds of this happening.

(2) I am not so sure I want her back. Outside of the kids and finances, I am having a hard time of finding a reason that I really would choose her. Every day that goes by with me having more fun than ever and free to dream again without considering her infinite number of conditions to be met makes me want to just end it.

(3) I will never pass up time with my boys. After a week without her, and a low stress one at that, I see that the source of the tension in our household comes from her, not from them!

BTW, dinner with my buddy was great. We chatted with his finance (awesome, centered girl) and then ate dinner together. I could not help but to give him a bit of advice on his pending marriage, as well as on his R with his dad who he does not talk to. Maybe it makes a difference, maybe not. But ya gotta try!

Well, that's enough for now!

SD