Do I want him back?

[forward]

Celestial, You're more generous than I am. I must confess to being secretly glad when he gets a kick, esp. a financial kick, because I did so much in way of practical support. Then I think, wow, maybe I'm more of a control freak than I thought.

I'm starting to feel as if I can breathe in the house again. I just felt like there was so much STUFF. I am not materialistic, and though H claims he isn't, he is REALLY going to find out now.

One thing I am trying to do is keep the place fairly clean. H used to be a neatnik (I'd be curious to know if he is now as when he is here he is quite the slob).

I am not being a neatnik--I am just being myself. Getting rid of stuff and having some plain walls without pictures has a clear spare feeling for me. I just want what I have to be meaningful and interesting and I want it to reflect ME.

ME