Are we piecing yet?

[Have Faith]

I have not posted in a long time. I never got very may responses to my posts and was so depressed that I stopped. My shortened version of my sitch is:

In mid January I found out my H was having an EA with a women 15 years younger then him and 24 years younger then me. He told me he was in love with her and in the e-mails that I found (which is how I discovered the A) he was talking marriage. They met at the gym (which I was also going to) at the end of November. I forced him to move out in mid March and he filed for a D. I signed the D papers, but in our state until he signs the D isn't final. He has until the end of October to do this. If he doesn't sign them, then they are null and void. He won't even talk about them and anytime I bring them up (which isn't very often, now) he says I'm not signing anything. He rented a room from a friend. Only took his clothes and toiletries. By mid May he was coming over for dinner in the evenings after working out (I changed to a different gym) and then started spending the nights. Nothing physical. Said that without being 100% committed to me or our marriage, he didn't think it was fair to me to have sex. Didn't want to dissapoint me. He now stays at our home every night. It is like it use to be. He still has clothes and toiletries at his friends house, but he is still communicating with the OW. He says that he is trying to break it off, but doesn't know if he can. He spends almost all of his spare time with me and we have had some good times together going to dinner, golfing and even took a vacation together. We have also had a lot of heart to heart talks. He realizes he is addicted to her.

My DB Counselor says that I just need to let the A die a natural death. That if I force his to stop it, he will always wonder if it would have worked out with her. We have so many positives, but he still doesn't wear his ring, except when we went on vacation and when we go to his aunt and uncle's.

I am so confused. How long does this take? Will she be in our lives forever? It is so hard for me to shut my mouth. I have finally stopped snooping because I would always find something and it just hurt so much. Why would a single 32 year old women without children put up with not seeing the man she thinks is her perfect fit (those are her words, not mine) on evenings, week-ends, and holidays. A man who does not take her anywhere, does not introduce her to his family or friends. What makes a women accept this????????? She only has 8 months invested in him. I could understand it if she had 18 years like I do.

Comments please.