I used to look forward to h comming home from work..even when he wasn't really here but was simply here...I used to want to do things with h..even when he didn't want to do things with me...
I find myself now not really caring one way or another if h work round the clock...when it snows..I just don't feel like I care anymore..and I know that is not the way it is supposed to be...I've grown to expect nothing from h...I still get a bit resentful at him for being here but not fully being here perhaps he is here as fully as is capable for him and not because part of him is elsewhere but because there is just something wrong with him??
I don't know??? but the one thing I do know is...this m isn't going to last and if for some stupid reason it does...it will not be a healthy one for at least one of us.
