well, one of the descriptions of retrouvaille (for one potential avenue) is that it is primarily to "improve communication " between the two of you. It usually has the side effect of reconcilation, when the two people realize that they actually CAN resolve issues between them \:\) but that is how the coordinator described it to me.
You might try calling the local coordinator for your area, and asking what it is like. and then potentially asking your wife to call and ask what it is like, to see what she thinks about it.

It's tough for her to say that she does not have a goal of "improved communication" between you two \:\)

My current status: june 2006. Wife ran out and filed D.
Finalized Jan 11, 2010, after 12.5 years M.
3 wonderful sons caught in the middle