whats normal and whats not normal is dependant on only one thing.....that is: has there been a huge drop off or increase compared to what you experienced when you met and fell in love with that person ...in others words ...compared to how often you were going horizontal prior to marriage. Everyone has heard the joke about why women all smile like crazy at their weddings (because they know they have given their last BJ) in my marriage we had established a fairly normal (for us) 3-4x/wk habit. Now we are once a month if I give her 29 days of our new method of foreplay: me begging!. Thats why its not normal because had I known that sex would be rationed out to the tune of once per month then we would not have gotten past the first month of dating ...seriously. Dr Laura Schlesinger's Book "the proper care and feeding of a husband" is directly 100% on point in her advice to married LD women ...usually the sex drive is attributable to the onset of children and fatigue. She says (and I wholeheartedly agree) that if the wife is too tired to have sexual feelings trump her desire for rest and sleep then she needs to cut back something out because she has an obligation to not be too tired. sounds anti woman controlling her own body doesn't it.. she answered one LD wife in her show who called complaining about her ND (normal drive) husband who made this remark "you mean I should do it even if I don't feel like it" DR L said "most of the time yes...absolutely! you expect him to go to work everyday and earn money when he doesn't feel like it ...and you expect him to visit and be nice to your relatives even if he doesn't want to and plan his social calendar to include things he may not want to do don't you ...it's called "loving obligation why should he be okay with the fact that you made the decision on your own that he should not have regular relations with his wife ...he married you thinking that what he saw was what he got and now you want to change the terms of your marriage without even consulting him or taking his feelings into consideration?...what most men want is a wife who still desires her husband and the fulfillment of that is the closeness in the sexual experience.from a mans point of view the fulfillment of that is the sexual experinece from a mans point of view if this does not happen his communication, moods, and masculine well being all suffer"
