So we left Thursday afternoon. Took the 6 hour trip I drove the whole way as my H had had a wreck shortly before we left. Luckily he's okay. Sore but otherwise fine. We got there went to dinner. Drove around a little bit. Went past his grandparents old house. Him recalling fond memories the whole time.
Friday during the day we went to a museum and a mall to pass the time. Friday evening was the viewing. His oldest son ended up flying in so he was there. Pretty much the whole 2 hours was spent with my H's family talking to me but him acting like I didn't exsist. Then we all had to go out to dinner together. That's when he started to interact with me.
This morning we got up and went to her funeral. He held my hand a couple times during. Then at the grave site he actually put his arm around me. My SS also came up a couple times and put his arm around me. One was to comfort me. Imagine my 14 yr old SS comforting me! The other was to tell me goodbye. We hung around and talked a little bit then we left.
Another 6 hour car ride this time though he drove. We actually talked and joked around and did a lot of kidding. Some sexual comments thrown out. He asked if he could borrow the van since he no longer has a car. So now I don't have a car but he'll come over if I need to use it I'm sure. Since he is tomorrow so I can go shopping.
Anyway the impression I got on the car ride and the little bit he hung out at the house was just maybe there is a chance. He kept saying he doesn't know how to get from where we are to where it's good. He said that several times. And he was very genuine. He really has no idea how too. When he left the house I took his hand and kissed it. And again he said his comment. He pulled out and drove away very slowly and actually waved by to me.
I guess I should also say our S3 locked the door when my H said he was leaving to keep him here. This went on for probably 15 minutes. He kept saying I don't want you to go no you can't go I locked the door. My H told me he's breaking my heart. Ya think?
Oh and during this trip there was once when he hit the top of my head, he put his hand on my couple a few times, when we stopped during the trip he put his arm around me and kinda of squeazed and then kinda of joking shoved me a little, he backed into my on purpose once. So there was some touching by him.
I just don't know. I don't want to get my hopes up. The trip had it's bad and good moments. He gave me the impression just maybe it's not over. But he could stop talking to me next week or the week after. I'm just glad I was able to be there during his time of mourning and there were actually a few positives that was made.
W: 33 H: 37 SS: 14 S: 7 S: 3 married 08/09/97 Seperated 11/02 05/07 H moved back 8/26/07
He kept saying he doesn't know how to get from where we are to where it's good. He said that several times. And he was very genuine. He really has no idea how too. When he left the house I took his hand and kissed it. And again he said his comment.
He is thinking about you and the family, that is a good thing, would he ever go to counseling, maybe not now but down the road?
Originally Posted By: sadhearted
I guess I should also say our S3 locked the door when my H said he was leaving to keep him here. This went on for probably 15 minutes. He kept saying I don't want you to go no you can't go I locked the door. My H told me he's breaking my heart.
I wonder if I could bribe my son to do that when I am suppose to be leaving her place.
Originally Posted By: sadhearted
Oh and during this trip there was once when he hit the top of my head, he put his hand on my couple a few times, when we stopped during the trip he put his arm around me and kinda of squeazed and then kinda of joking shoved me a little, he backed into my on purpose once. So there was some touching by him.
I think normally that might be a boundary not to cross, but with everything I can remember you posting, let him.
Originally Posted By: sadhearted
I just don't know. I don't want to get my hopes up. The trip had it's bad and good moments. He gave me the impression just maybe it's not over. But he could stop talking to me next week or the week after. I'm just glad I was able to be there during his time of mourning and there were actually a few positives that was made.
Your right, he could stop talking next week, don't push or ask. Just let it flow from his side right now. Baby steps ya know !
M 41 W 33 S8 S17 Bomb 3/11/07 S 3/28/07 New beginning? 8/31/07
None what so ever. Son is at IL's, left thursday and comes back a week from tomorrow . If any good comes from this it is that my wife does not have to interact one iota with me since no phone calls need to be made for goodnites or who and when he is being picked up. Not that I don't want to see or talk to her, but this will truly be space for her, maybe some time to think with no pressure, but who knows. You know me, just won't give up if I think their is any type of chance.
M 41 W 33 S8 S17 Bomb 3/11/07 S 3/28/07 New beginning? 8/31/07
We actually talked and joked around and did a lot of kidding. Some sexual comments thrown out. He asked if he could borrow the van since he no longer has a car. So now I don't have a car but he'll come over if I need to use it I'm sure. Since he is tomorrow so I can go shopping. 
. If any good comes from this it is that my wife does not have to interact one iota with me since no phone calls need to be made for goodnites or who and when he is being picked up. Not that I don't want to see or talk to her, but this will truly be space for her, maybe some time to think with no pressure, but who knows. You know me, just won't give up if I think their is any type of chance.