H's bday is Monday. He will be 49. I just sent a card with a dreamcatcher on the cover, the legend on the inside and words like "wishing you a happy year, Happy Birthday". I just signed my first name. <sigh>
I feel like I am moving backwards. It hit me that it will be 2 years of birthdays since I have seen him. I wish I could know for sure that it was MLC and not just him "moving on". He still doesn't talk to parents or DD. What a miserable life in my mind. How can you live like that?
The other thing is being a parent. I know the kids will hate you sometimes for what you do. Right now DD wants to work during the school year. This won't be bad if the place she works at closed at a decent hour but they are open till 10:00 pm and then they have to clean, which usually takes 1 hour, by the time she gets home it's almost midnight (and I have to drive her around). She wants to continue crew and has weight lifting at 6:30 am so I put my foot down and said no. Now she is sulking and not speaking to me and all the other things to make me feel like an ogre. I tried explaining that even working only Fri/Sat means she will miss out of alot of stuff and suggested she find a job that closes at an early hour and is closer to home for about 10-15 hours. No go, she wants this job! <sigh> GAHHEHHEHEH -
singing "no body loves me, everybody hates me, guess I'll go eat worms....."
Sitting quietly doing nothing, the flowers bloom effortlessly.
bomb: Jan 25, 2006 not seen since DD moved in with H - 9/1/08 H filed for divorce - 11/2008 Divorce dismissed by courts - 4/2010 still nothing
