Well my H also had a much younger OW...close enough to be a sister to his own D's...so, yes, I know that feeling...but it isn't really fair to use another person to fuel your revenge...in fact it isn't fair to get another person, especially of the opposite sex involved in your life if you are still on the fence...I hear what you are saying about your feelings toward your H...and I can totally relate...but...and I know I hated the "buts"...until it is all over...and usually for sometime after...you have your own healing to do...and you must do it on your own because to use someone else in this process just stalls you where you left off and believe me this will come back to bite you in the "but"...
Be especially cautious of the online stuff that goes "off line"...btdt and it isn't what it seems when you finally meet IRL...and even if it is...well, you are playing fire!
Morgan...my H didn't even care that OM was calling me...or so he acted that way...sounds like yours atleast feels jealousy...mine didn't even feel that...but for future reference...don't be tooooo mysterious so as to have go into an argument like that...I always told H his name and that he was a new friend...and he did know that I didn't personally know him but that he was just someone I enjoyed talking to...yours might still get jealous in which case I would ask "Do you want me to stop talking to him?"...and my reply to anything he said would be "I think you know the answer to that."...but every H is different so you do what is best...and you now know that being too mysterious about "a friend" doesn't go well with yours...but then maybe this might bring about a change in him...who knows...
