Yes, it is best for my S to grow up with his parents in a loving R. Yes, I am trying to convince myself that I do not want her. No, I have no pride. Yes, I'm trying very hard to keep my focus.
Fact: Despite my being hard to live with, all my little annoying tendencies, all the good arguments she could make for leaving me, I have never, ever, ever shown the slightest lack of commitment to her, and have always expressed my love for her constantly.
This is the only 180 that matters. I have to show her that I am ready, willing, able, and downright excited to move on without her. That is just about the only way that I can see giving her the chance to step up and DO SOMETHING.
I deserve better. I do not believe that she is now, nor will ever be, capable of being a person that derserves me, or doing what is necessary to offer any repair of the damage that she alone has chosen to cause.
But, who knows? Maybe she will prove me wrong.
Trust me on this folks. If I'm wrong, it's no skin off your nose. If I'm right, and she takes the challenge, She, My Son, and maybe even I could embark on something truly wonderful.
