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nddt,

you handled the list with class, that is the answer to all of it, handle it with class.

i can't imagine her trashing the place, but then again my w left things a total mess, but think about this, if she wants that dresser where do you think she is going to put your stuff in it, on the floor. don't take it personal, its just moving. we have all done it and it gets messy.

i wouldn't ask for a key, and then try and work as a team on the mortgage. not sure if this works for you, but i try and never call my place, my place, i refer to it as our place and she has used it in the past, and hopefully tomorrow she does again.

does she take things? sure, but remember they are all objects. i had missing diapers, tp, etc... she needs these things and if she would let me i would buy them. just objects.

you know, i'm not sure about packing her stuff up, it says one thing, but is also an action of help. that is a tough one, only you know. plus family will be there, bil's could enforce, see he has your stuff ready to go, your doing the right thing. or, look he did this for you. well don't get lost in the details, its the big picture that you have to pay attention to.


Me: 31
W: 31
S: 2
Bomb 6-24-07
Seperated 6-24-07
W Filed October
Temp. Hearing 11-26-07
Completely Sober Jan. 2, 08.
Joined: May 2007
Posts: 645
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Random thoughts occuring........obviously am not in bed yet.

"Hey as long as you are not going to wear your ring, can I have it back?" lol not nice, or helpful

Leave notes all over the place, so she and all who come to help her move find them???? such as, it does not have to be this way....
so they all know that this is her pushing for this????

might be some merit to this idea, maybe not obvious notes, but maybe a personal journal that could be stumbled across?????? hmmmmm

ok bed time

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Hi. Today my attitude is whatever. Just letting all this crap slide off. I feel more detached. I am gonna get through the next month and am gonna come out better than I went into it.

I am going to start moving on with my life, if at some point, she chooses to come back and work on things, well I might be willing. I might have moved past it. Dont know, I am tired of limbo land. Gonna get my finances straighten out. Gonna become the best man I can. If she sees it well then good. If she dont.....well I am willing to bet sooner or later someone will....

I am leaving my options open, to whatever life puts my way at this point.

G

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NDDT...I know how hard limbo land is....stay strong \:\)


H-32
Me-29
T-10years
M-4yr (10/04)
Me- WAW 1/07
I filed for D 2/07
D put on hold 5/07
H re-files for D 9/08
WOW! trying MC 10/08

"Work like you don't need the money, dance like nobody is watching, love like you've never been hurt!"
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Well I am about 13 hours out from appointment with legal counsel.
Dont know why I feel so bad about this. I suppose it is because almost 5 years ago, I stood in a church, (a beautful church) in front of family.........friends.......God And pledged the rest of my life to this woman. Now I feel that I need to at least "explore my options" by seeking legal advice!!! This was not the way this story was supposed to be.....dammit!

ok.....

I plan to discuss with the council, the whole situation. My main focus at the moment is what to do about financial obligations concerning out house. I also plan to discuss what I should do from this point to cover my backside. Concerning.......financial obligations, and bigger our child.

I will probably place a retainer. I AM NOT GOING TO FILE THE "D" PAPERS. I will not allow the attorney to convince me that I should. I plan to listen to what is said to me, and plan to put a "100 hour rule" on it.

Ahh man, this was not the way things were supposed to be. Will there ever be a happy ending in my life?????

I am going out.......

Last edited by NDDT; 08/01/07 02:54 AM.
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I can understand having mixed feelings about the L appt. You are doing the right thing, though. You are making sure that you and your child are being protected. You are not filing papers or doing anything that will help end your M. You are getting info that you need. There is no reason to feel bad about that.

LOL, I like your 100 hour rule. \:\)


Me(34)
H(36)
M for 11 yrs
S4
D1.5
Bomb 9/2006

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nddt,

look an attorney isn't called counsel for nothing, you seeking counsel, and if you don't like the counsel your getting, then seek something else. you don't have to put crap down until you make sure your on the same page. in all honesty, if l doesn't agree with you, and you voice this, i bet the l will recommend one that would. generally, all are pretty good at doing that sort of thing, they know who will do that type of work or work that way. don't settle there, just like picking a therapist, you choose your attorney, pick one that represents you, not just legally.

taking care of the house isn't the final gavel drop on this and you don't have to have it be.


Me: 31
W: 31
S: 2
Bomb 6-24-07
Seperated 6-24-07
W Filed October
Temp. Hearing 11-26-07
Completely Sober Jan. 2, 08.
Joined: May 2007
Posts: 645
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ok........deep breath..... here we go..

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Well, the appointment was not too painful. Of course he thinks I should file, told him that I am not ready as of yet. Will consider all that he told me though. He thinks that me hanging onto the house would be a wise choice, many advantages to it. I got alot to kick around here today, also have to entertain my child.

I will post more later on this.

G

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Let us know.


M 39
W 39
M'd 10 yrs; T 14 yrs
S7 D4
Bomb 5-8-05
W not working on M 1-22-07; EA 2-22
DB 4-10
S 6-11
No more C
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