Thanks Sunny! I try to help where I can, but I am no Nomo.
Quote:
You sure know how to pack a few things in there!
Were you like that b/f GALing?
I have been known to have a bit too much energy sometimes.
The main difference since I started DBing is that I have stopped focussing so much on work/achievement and more on important stuff like my happiness, my kids, and non-work interests.
SD
Me 41 W 41 Kids: S9 S7 Married 16 years Bomb dropped 2/2/07 Still living together! current thread
Journaling: Just got back from a night/day at our family house on the bay with the kids and my parents. Did some fishing and skiing and just hung out without having to worry about anything at all.
W is still in Austin with her sister. Every time she has called to check on the kids, we have been out. I have them call back and have tried to avoid talking to her at all (just don't want to even have to pretend to be OK with her sh!t).
Today, she left a message saying what a great day she had and how much she loved the boys. I am not really sure how to take this as she likely has been seeing a lot of OM. I again did not talk to her, but will have to as we are meeting her at her sister's place on Sunday and staying through Tuesday. In some ways, I am looking forward to this since it will be an interesting experiment. In other ways, I am reaching the end of my rope and am really just ready for her to be gone.
On a more happy note, the kids and I will again be out on the water at my uncle's lake house for the next few days. I have been having a blast the past few days (played golf twice with my Dad, bay house trip, went to the zoo, lots of swimming, card playing, eating, etc.), so that is really a help for my PMA.
Still, it could be so much more fun with a happy, participative woman at my side... If only that were my W!
SD
Me 41 W 41 Kids: S9 S7 Married 16 years Bomb dropped 2/2/07 Still living together! current thread
SD, Glad the RandR is going well. Sure know what you mean about having more fun with a willing W at your side. Going back to the time thing I brought up earlier, I think you touched on that better than what I meant. I think we need to give this the adequate time for us to be sure we will have no regrets. Even that may be a little to high of an expectation, considering hind sight is 20/20 and I think there will be a little regret regardless. Glad the PMA is high and not talking to w right now is a good way to go, considering. Just when we reach the end of our ropes, I am finding that someone tie's on an extention.
SD - glad you're having so much fun!! Sounds like an interesting experiment coming up - hope it helps give you some clarity on what you want.
Me 35, H 38; Together 13.5 yrs, M 7 Bomb 1 10/07/06 Sep'd 1/14/07 - 4/15 Piecing: 4/07 - 9/07 Bomb 3 10/11/07: Never loved you, let's separate 2/08 slowly improving 7/08 Piecing (7/25/08 rings back on!!) Current thread
Journaling: I spent the weekend with the boys at my uncle's lake house. It was really a blast. The TX hill country is so gorgeous, the lake was full, and the beer was cold! The kids loved it as did I.
The theme song for the weekend was "Is Anybody Goin' to San Antone" by the Texas Tornadoes." Basically about a guy who got left behind and is moving on. How apropos! S6 asked to hear it about a dozen times!
I also got to talk with my uncle about my sitch. He divorced after 8 years with his first wife and is 10 years into his second marriage and was the first one in my family who I told about the sitch. He (like most people) could not believe that I was still trying to find a way to reconnect with my W. I explained more about my W's refusal to attend MC or IC and also about her many issues (incl. possible depression).
He strongly stated that it was critical to get her to go to IC and suggested that I should try to talk to my sister in law about it. Not mention details of W's dirty laundry, just say something like:
"SIL, you know that W and I are having trouble with our marriage. I am not sure if our M has a chance or not, and I know that I could have done many things much better in our M. I have been attending IC for several months and it has really helped me to understand what I need to make me happy.
I still care for W deeply and am very concerned about her. I believe that W could similarly benefit from counseling, and I have mentioned this to her, but she seems hesitant to go. If you also think that she could benefit from counseling, I would appreciate it if you could discuss this with her.
Note that we are all at SIL's house for the next 2 days and W has been here for a week and will stay for a few more days before we all drive back to FL (15 hours). I am not sure 1. If this is a good idea. 2. If now is the right time.
Anyhow, I appreciate any input!
SD
Me 41 W 41 Kids: S9 S7 Married 16 years Bomb dropped 2/2/07 Still living together! current thread
