I don't think all W are that way...maybe more the ones that have some issues to begin with...I figured if my kids were intent on listening..OH WELL...they have to know we love each other so I just put a lock on our bedroom door and taught them NEVER to walk in...problem solved!
Sandi...I can tell you why your H probably mentioned he didnt' want to live by the "buddy-buddy" system...because he now KNOWS you are capable of sexual feelings and desires!...before he may have thought it was all dead and he didn't want to make you do something that you couldn't...but now with the EA/OM he knows better and feels that if you stay he should benefit from those feelings...and I agree...
BUT...that is way down on the list...as many have stated...you need to start actions that will lead to feelings...one step at a time...just sitting in the same room to start...there is no time limit...just progress...baby steps...the feelings will follow the actions just like they did with OM...you didn't just start up with him like it was when it ended...you both fed into it...you fanned the flames...and the fire grew...the fire wouldn't have grown if someone didn't fan...right???
