H came over last night & even though FA says to feed H dinner is cake eating I just can't turn down food to someone who is hungry ( even if he is H who continues to hurt me). I was almost finished cooking when he came in and said he was starving and looking at the food like, are you gonna offer me some? I said well I made plenty help your self.

Backing up a bit: Earlier in the day yesturday I emailed H some things that were on my mind since last weekend was total drama. Since I told H no more sleep overs @ OW's w/ the girls & that if he wanted to do that to make this thing LEGAL once & for all to go & file. H was furious and said he would be filing this week.
The email was as follows:

Children need to have structure & boundaries. I know that people who have affairs have no boundaries to live by & that is why they can live their life day by day w/out a care of how it affects the ones close to them.Can you imagine if everyone in the world lived their lives w/out any boundaries? We have children invovled & someone has to be the responsible parent and set up boundaries. Just like your mother told you she will not stay over @ your place while you are still married b/c she does not condone, your children will not either until we are divorced.

You see my intentions are not to hurt you it is the boundadries within that my children will live by even though their father thinks it is perfectly normal to live this way. People in affairs justify their actions everyday to convince themselves this is the normal way w/out any morals.

I dont know if you have filed already or if this is what you really want. BUT if you honestly want to make things right and you still want to return home, then do it. Dont wait until the wekend or the next week, dont analize it anymore & just go for it. (the reason i told him this is b/c he was always saying he wants to return but he doesn't think I want him to come back) Wait any longer & it will be too late. ( i said this b/c I will see an attorney this Friday)

Like I said before I will not stand in your way if you still file.

Basically I want him to know the door is not completely shut yet. Just leaving it up to him now.