Waltzing again -one decision at a time!

[TwinDragon]

Matilda, I agree with Slowly. We need to be in control of our lives and not let the EX's encroach their control on us.

Even after all the time that I have been separated and all the growth I've done. I found that EX still has some control over me and it is I that is allowing it.

I've been dating and one thought that occured to me. I wanted to rub the fact that my "new" woman is prettier, wealthier, smarter, and better than the EX. I realized this is normal thinking, but it shows that she still has some control over me. I had to stop that type of thinking.

I just need to live my life great and soar. This is controlling my life and who cares what EX thinks or does unless it effects my daughters.

Have a good time with your friend.

TD

[amd]

Hi Matilda! I hope this time with your friend helps you form a new outlook--one that is all yours, all the time! Maybe it's time to list some goals? I know you were working on decluttering the house. What else do you want to do that is good for YOU?

Be well.

[NNP1965]

Hi Matilda, amd has a good suggestion. This might be a good time to type out some goals. Maybe I should do that too, it has been quite a while.

How is your D16 doing?

[FA]

Look at all the oldtimers giving you advice girl!!!!!

Run with it!

[JAK58]

Matilda,

That goes to show how much H is still in the MLC cloud as he is blaming you for a M failing that the two of you were in together.

I think I might find another enjoyable thing to do rather than have H take you and company out on boat.( im'e sorry it just sounds like pursuing) Even if it is with darling D. Go dark cause everytime you do, you make him wonder.(thats is you want to)

Remember take back control!



JAK

[Matilda2]

Having my friend and her family here is a nice distraction. I do need to rethink my goals.....goals just for ME! Thanks everyone for helping me move forward!

[JAK58]

. I do need to rethink my goals.....goals just for ME! Thanks everyone for helping me move forward!

Matilda,

This sounds great. What goals can you think of that you can post? then we can hit you with the 2X4 if you slide from them.

JAK

[Yoyowife]

Matty,
I think JAK has a good suggestion about not going boating with them. Tell him you have plans already with a friend. Even if you don't, he doesn't have to know that! Maybe he will think it is a male friend!

[JAK58]

Matilda,

In my Op if H wanted to divorce you so bad he would have filed things you are saying tells me otherwise

There are so many sitches I have read where the spouse comes hom ehwile still in the middle of MLC only to want out for a while again.

I think you need to sit down and decide if your done with this or if you want to ride it out and see if he comes around.

if you ride it out detach and be the best you that i know you can be (by your threads).


If you do not want this D tell him that if he wants it he can file becuase you are not.


JAK

[PennyMB]

Hi Mattie,

its me I'm back. Thank you for checking on me. It has been very eventful the last few days. The days kinda get a way from me. i was really busy at work and at work at home with our business. It is so dry in the west that we have to watch for fires. They have burned all around us. Then I get this brilliant Idea to paint my bedroom and make a change. Change is good they tell me so I did. Now for the bomb shell....H had a job in Minnesota till November. A very high paying job and he was having them send me the checks?????????Go figure while keeping in touch with OW and Me daily. The part of the job he was on is over and he would have moved to a different spot but he quits and is coming home to help his brother whose son was in a fatal accident a year ago to sell that business. So I took the day off yesterday and painted the around the windows my deck and the doors and weed eated. I was like a tornado I think it was anxiety about having to face the drama of having him back and being with her and being distant. About a month ago I told him I had it. He is so going thru a midlife crisis for the last 10 years. He has been listening to positive thinking and getting control of your life CD's. Some of them are good. i just don't know what to think...DRAMA DRAMA...She has told people that we are divorced. I had them ask me when I went to those funerals. I said not yet and no one has filed. One guy who she told h that he had chased her and wanted her told be that was all a ly and you can't believe her that she is evil and to watch my back. What a deal.... I guess i will just keep saying those prayers and see what life will deal me. One day at a time.
Mat,

I listened to a site called nightingale.com...it is on goal setting and making the most for you. I actually talked to one of the guys. Very intersting on focusing on us and goals. I had gotten out of the goal setting for myself let a lone carrying thru. I have made the first step. It was write down on cards what you want to accomplish for yourself and read them all thru the day. Change your thought pattern for you to become better.

Thanks again for checking on me I hope you are having a good day.