That's pretty outrageous btw.. just me though.. My boys just finished doing the dinner dishes.. a good sound !
I guess if anything positive can come from this mess.. well.. the kids becoming a bit more responsible may be one of them (?).
Early yesterday morning before court I dropped my oldest (14) and one of his friends off at a nearby lake to fish in his 8' aluminum jonboat.. picked them up early in the afternoon . I was proud of him .. things like that.
Well, tomorrow we sign the D paperwork and she gets her wish of destroying our family. Within a month I will be officially D.
Also tomorrow, I sign paperwork to buy a new house. The inspection is in the morning, and then we will sign a contract for me to rent and then buy the house.
W is all business, tracking all the money like a CPA. Heartless.
built4speed My Saga "How others deal with the gifts you've given is not your decision, but theirs." - Richard Bach
I signed the house contract and W gave me my house equity so I can put the down payment on it.
Moving this week. W is actually a bit jealous of my new house. She said she would trade even up sight unseen. It's very close to the lake in town, and I met my next door neighbor who said I he'd take me out on the lake as soon as I get settled. He also said the kids could use his kids basketball hoop in his driveway anytime.
My parents came over to see it and then we went out to dinner. I love the house location. It's so close to everything we were to dinner in about three minutes. I am really going to enjoy this house the next few years.
It remains to be seen if this brings the kids closer. We are all very close already.
built4speed My Saga "How others deal with the gifts you've given is not your decision, but theirs." - Richard Bach
Well. it is done. I have moved out. I'm sitting in my new house amid the boxes and furniture. Nothing much is different between me and W except I sleep 2 miles away instead of two rooms. I went over tonight to get some clothes and helped her get the printer working. Now it's her problem.
I had the mandatory parenting class tonight. One more session next week and she will file the papers and it will be official. I told her she can take the day off to go to court, I certainly am not. This has been her deal from the beginning and she can finish it.
She is understanding life is much harder. She went from a country club wife to a single mom working full time and is pretty much exhausted all the time. My guess is it would have been easier to just work on the marriage instead of quitting, but that was not my call to make.
She went from no financial worries to $200,000 in loans and a dead even budget. She gets to see her kids for only half of their time instead of every day. She is now riding the mower for the first time, gets to figure out how to tow the pop-up, and how to handle the kids without a man in the house.
Life with me must have really sucked for her to trade our life for her life. Unfortunately, she'll figure out that perhaps we had it pretty good a little too late. Or she won't.
Twenty years of building a life and a few months to destroy it all.
Well, I'm going to have the best revenge by living well. I got an awesome house by the lake, just got a new job, and will be going to the US Olympic Track and Field Trials next June. My mom wants to take me out furniture shopping. And we are signing up for another sailboat race in Lake Michigan in September. Next year I'll get a little boat for the lake by my house and the kids will never want to leave. I already had a gal tell me I'm her "perfect mind", and I'm not even dating yet. Things will just get better from here on out.
And W can go to hell.
built4speed My Saga "How others deal with the gifts you've given is not your decision, but theirs." - Richard Bach
It is not the end but only the beginning !? The anger and frustration with your spouse will pass and life will be whatever you make of it !
That is the best thing btw atleast to me. We once had incompetent co-captains of our fleet.. now we can take the helm and guide this ship to where we want it to be.
So far, so good. Unpacking, getting the LAN running (although my wireless router is being stubborn), stopped at W's house last night and got four big boxes of kitchen stuff and some food. Basically just the basement to go though and I'm totally out of there.
Kids are chomping at the bit to come over. I got the beds put together for the boys, but D14 will be sleeping on the pit group in the basement for awhile. She doesn't mind.
Looked at furniture tonight on the way home. I need a bedroom set. Some very nice stuff out there for what I thought was reasonable prices. I guess i need to look longer.
I have the last parenting class tomorrow, clearing the last obstacle to the D. If this is what she wants, she is getting it. I am getting going on the next chapter. She still calls me to chat at least every other day, but once I get the rest of my stuff out of the house, I need to nip that for a while. I want to forget about her. I want to become a stranger to her. I want her to feel life without me. I don't know if it will be bad or a relief to have me gone. I hope she is happy, otherwise this is all for nothing. But either way, that is what she is going to get. I need to forget about her and move on.
I am closing on my house Friday. W is scheduled for court next week on Tuesday. Then that will be it. All her dreams come true.
The counselor for the kids says the only issue that messes up the kids is our disagreements after the D. So the D will have little impact. I think she's full of it. That is why this is so hard.
built4speed My Saga "How others deal with the gifts you've given is not your decision, but theirs." - Richard Bach
Just concentrate on you and the kids.. get yourself settled in that is the main thing.
Make your new place comfortable for your kids.. and uncomfortable for the stbx.. they will need to be there with you.. and she will want to be (just my thought) but you will need to nip it when and if the attempt happens.