Mark...I am the worrier and the anxiety producer in our R as well...sometimes it helps to talk about these feelings with our S...as long as you are at a point where you can do this...
As for the apology...I know it took my H a long time to apologize and it wasn't what I really had expected...but as someone said sometimes we just have to accept that they are back and are dealing with things that we may not be aware of...
I know I ask my H if he is happy he came home...just hear him answer "Yes, I am" is very good for me to hear...
I am like you and don't do well with drugs...so I have had to learn to deal with things on my own...sometimes it is just taking a break mentally from my problems until I feel ready to deal with them...
