If ever I thought I didn't matter, you have all straightened me out on that matter. I feel so much better. Thank you nicola. I am glad that I could help. For the first time in my life, I feel as if I have finally dealt with the issues from my childhood abuse. I give all the glory to God for this. I hope that I have helped you with this s well. It is an issue that you are never over but it does get easier to handle.
I believe that at times I have sabotaged my relationships because I didn't feel worthy. All of my accomplishments lately have helped with my self-worth. It has taken me most of the last two years to get over the feeling that getting my degree destroyed my marriage. I now know that it would probably have happened even if I hadn't went back to school.
On Wednesday, I was told that I would be moving to a new building. I will now be teaching Science to three groups and teaching US History to my home group. My supervisor (principal) said that I was chosen to be one of the three co-teaching partners because I was strong in my subject and I have done such a good job in my first two years teaching. She asked me if I realized how strong I was to have dealt with all I have had to deal with in the last two years. Until someone starts listing what has gone on in my life in the last two years, I forget how much as really happened. My degree, new job, H leaving, filing for D, finding out about OW who was a friend, S32's cancer diagnosis, furnace problems twice in the middle of winter, and major vehicle issues.
I am a strong person and I will be fine without H but I also know that is not the plan God has for H and I. Thank you all so much for your kind words and loving support.
God bless you all.
Everything happens for a reason, maybe Dad needs to find that it isn't better out there, he needs to realize how good he had it here. Maybe he will find God and that is the most important thing when he finds Him he will know he is supposed to come home.
