Newbie ? How public was your spouse's affair?

[Ophelia]

I'm so sorry you've had to make such a discovery, mkultra. *hugs*

Mine only told me he had a new girlfriend because he didn't want me finding out from anyone else. Yep, last to know. Worst feeling in the world. I felt completely humiliated on top of everything else. In his opinion, he's just "moving on with his life" and not doing anything to be ashamed of, so I don't know if he ever even tried to hide it from anyone in the beginning.

I assume my H's gf hangs out with people who used to be my friends. They've been together for a while now, so she's probably met his parents, too. Probably gone to their place for dinner and sat in the same chair I used to sit in, eating off the same plates I used to eat off. Wish there was a tactful way I could ask my ILs how well they know her, but I know there isn't. We don't even talk about H anymore when I see them, no matter how desperately I want to ask them about him.

Thinking about it all makes me sick and angry.