Oh Willing!! I am so sorry about this! Lots and lots of (((HUGS))) for you!! I so know how you are feeling! My H is also involved in a EA. Finding out about it feels like your breathe has been sucked right out of you, but I am sure you don't need me to tell you that or be reminded of it! I just read what Nomo wrote and agree 100% with everything he said so I don't have a lot to add right now except offering my support.
All the feelings you feel are completely normal. It will get better and you will get better about controling your emotions. I can say this from personal experience. When I found out about my H's EA I thought it would never get better but accepting that you can't control it will help to ease the pain. Make sure you keep coming here for support. Unfortunatly, there are a lot of people on these BB who know exactly what you are going through. I have found this to be most helpful!
Some more (((hugs))) for you. I will check back in on you later!
