This is why we are here .... to support each other, listen, and where you can vent in a safe environment.
There is no point in having an on again, off again R, so I would agree that once it is over, that that is how it should remain when it's just bf/gf stuff. However, when there are many years invested in a M, with children, then I also see no harm in revisiting the possibilities of reconciliation, even after D. IMO!
Sounds like your W lives a full, and interesting life, so one has to wonder why the affairs, why the dissatisfaction??? Perhaps she is too much the princess, too spoilt, or just not seeing all her blessings and having gratitude in her heart??? Maybe, she does need a D, for her to ultimately see what is right there in front of her face. Maybe, she does need to lose it all, to know what she has. But, I guess that's God's perogative to teach her the lesson, while you, the LBS, should choose to do the right by your M vows, and your children.
It is a difficult thing, this piecing, isn't it, Phoenix!? One does have to be patient, but I often wonder if I will be on my deathbed still being patient (excuse the unintended pun), and how I would feel then, if my H never truly came back all the way into the M. I guess we will know when it's the right time to walk away, when patience will not win the war, only the odd battle.
We had some interesting lessons today at church ... on the holy ghost, revelation, and missionary work. They all seemed to work into my pondering on my M, the general direction of my life, and so on. Lots of food for thought.
Take care.
Me:57 H:52 M:28 Got another lawyer last year and filed. D35,S/D twins28,D22 EA4/04 End? Who knows? "Life is like a mirror. Smile at it and it smiles back at you." — Peace Pilgrim
