Went on business yesterday to one of W & my favorite towns. Weird being there without her, remembering our fav restaurants and hangouts. Decided to see a psychic/astrologer for fun, and in hopes of hearing a different perspective. Was told things that nobody could possibly know about her/us less they knew us well, and that I should focus on my needs, career and health, and not worry about W right now...basically I was told to DB! Haha. Ok, I agreed, but in terms of finding a new place to rent, what if the place I choose is not the environment my W would want to move to with me (city vs. burbs. I know we were talking about renting a house while we saved to buy one within the next couple of years, but this place is an apt. in the middle of a downtown area in town nearby that she usually doesn't feel comfortable hanging out in (too stuffy). Just feel like I need to be around some noise and distractions (positive) vs. isolated in a rental hse. she may never move into anyway. And thinking, hey, it's only a year, and if that's what breaks the camel's back then she must not want me that bad to begin with. In other news, have heard reports she is up to old ways, partying and self-medicating again, something she said she didn't want anymore of and had moved past. I'm now worried about her, but feel powerless to help her as she is not only drinking again, but drinking to run from our M, which I think may put her on the defensive and likely to just do it more should I say something about it. arggghhhhhhh
