When's it my turn?

[SDFoundGirl]

Ahhh....feeling SO SO good! I have working my BUTT off on this whole LW thing, and I think I'm finally getting somewhere.

Yesterday was LW's birthday. H came home with leftovers from lunch. When I asked him where they were from, he said he'd gone out to lunch with work people for a change. When I asked him who with (really, not an interrogation like it sounds here, just the kind of conversation we usually have), he hesitated and told me Julie & John (names changed).

Now, I'm guessing J & J WERE there, but I do not buy for one minute that it was only them. It doesn't make sense given everything I know. Anyway, I'm pretty sure everyone went out to celebrate the snatch's birthday and H is *sort of* lying to me.

Guess what? Don't care. Don't care what his reasons are (i.e., he might think it would upset me, or he might still want to get in her panties but I'm guessing not), don't care if that's true or not, just don't care.

This was a HUGE achievement for me, to truly not feel that icky thumpy thing in my chest when thinking about her and H. Now, that's not to say I EVER EVER EVER want to hang out with her again...I'm pretty sure that's off the table. Too much history, and I don't know if I'm big enough to treat her nicely.

So, still some work to do, but I'm getting better....

SD