Klm, I was going to add he wants me to keep this house and I am not sure why though it is overwhelming in work. A woods and dead trees, lots of work he never did to it in 14 years. We only have 5 years left on the mortgage and owe very little so everyone tells me to keep it if he is that guilty he wants to give it to me, or buy me out for very little.
I said I might want to sell it and split the money and he said I am not doing one thing to fix it up. He took a few things and has left me with a lifetime of things to get rid of. He claims I can sell it and cash out. Like yours they forget about listing fees, and all the work involved. I could not afford a mover either and have no one to help. I brought up selling as a stall technique as the market is not moving well and he knows it. H is all about getting this moving. There is no one else and I think he is turning into a mushroom in his apt. My therapist wants me to do pro se and have us jointly file as in Wi there is a120 day cooling off period and H can just sit alone and then perhaps he will miss me. He is angry and still has my face on that anger. My therapist is solution based and I have been with him for 4 years, he thinks H will be back. He was right the other 2 times and I trust him completely. Scared, but nothing is worse than the anger directed at me. T claims that once we get this martial settlement stuff done H will have nothing to argue with me and will start missing me. I am independent but not financially. That bugs him to death. Mad now after I didn't work all these years.
In your case maybe a 180 is the key. If you took such good care of everything while he was gone perhaps you need to show him you do need him. Just a thought. Do the unexpected. I hang on to believe little of what they say mantra. And one from my therapist. Now is not forever. I tell that now is feeling like a really long time! Hope this helps. I should go to the club and work out, but friday night really is lonely there too. I will not give that up, my social and mental sanity.
