Go to sleep. You need to give her space. Talk to her, but not about the marriage or the affair. Do not do anything that may be perceived as pursuing her. In other words, DO NOT to anything special for her (this includes staying up for her). Don't make her a late snack, or have a glass of wine ready, etc.
You need to work on YOURSELF. You have not mentioned any GAL activities. You need to work on doing things to improve/change yourself. What is it that you have always wanted to do? Take lessons (for ANYTHING: karate, golf, dance, hang gliding, etc), take up a new hobby... fer cryin out loud, get out and DO SOMETHING. This will do two things: First, take your mind off of the pain you feel. Second, it will make you more attractive to WAW.
Finally, I need to mention something. My wife has the sense to not talk to OM when I am home (he lives 300 miles away). On rare occasions, she will text him, telling him she is leaving and he is to call her in XX minutes (I am a recovering snooper). Yesterday was the first time I "walked in" on them. She did not expect me home, and I walked in a back room where she was talking very quietly on the phone. The only regret that I have is that I left the room. I should have just grabbed a chair and sat down. It's my damn house, and she was my wife first. I think it was cowardly of me to walk away. As it turns out, she was indeed on the phone with OM, because and she ended the call immediately. I said nothing of the incident (she probably expected that I would & I was glad to disappoint her). BTW, this is the ONLY thing my cheating WAW does that shows any kind of respect for me.
So I guess what I am trying to say is that I don't understand any LBS permitting the cheating WAS to nurture and participate in the affair on their "home turf," especially when LBS is home (I KNOW my wife has called him from our home when I am not there). Maybe I'm way off base here (and please tell me if I am), but at the very least, I would request that any conversations with OM/OW be conducted far away from me. Say: "Please do not talk to OM/OW any time when I am home. At the very least, it is tremendously disrespectful."
