Lessons from a former WAS

[sadhearted]

My H left 2 1/2 months ago. In the beginning I did the pleading and begging. Now I leave him alone. If he talks to me I'll talk back. I don't push anything or talk about our R. The only thing that he brought up about D was the day after he left and said he was going to drag his feet. He hasn't said anything about taking his name off bills, joint accounts, or seeing a lawyer. All he took with him were the clothes he needed. I see him hurting as well. He told me this pain he knows what to expect and when. If he opens up again then he won't know when or where or how the pain will hurt him. He said he doesn't trust anyone including me right now. Sometimes he still talks to me about issues he may be having all the while saying he's not supposed to be leaning on me. Lately he's backed off and isn't really talking to me. He just changed jobs and is still putting me on his insurance.

Having said all that I guess I'm wondering how done with our marriage he really is? Most of the time I can think he's not as done as he likes to say. I have my days though where it feels like he really is done. I believe he's confused and just doesn't know what to do. He once told our S7 that he was afraid to come home....

Any thoughts?