I think I want to give up. HELP!!!

[NeedSomePatience]

I don't know if her R with OM is falling apart. I am so confused. She has been saying how she is in a drought lately (sex), and found a receipt with feminine products on it, so I suspect she was going to end her drought with him last night. When she got home, she offered for me to sleep on her bed with her because I have a hurt shoulder (she usually would offer to switch bed and couch). She talked on the phone with OM for about an hour, then I went to lie down on her bed. I told her (and maybe I shouldn't have, but i needed to get it out) that I am happy for her that she is finding some kind of happiness even if it pains me to see it sometimes. She said she is not 100% happy. I told her it is some kind of happiness and I am glad one of us is having some happiness. I sort of mentioned that maybe I need to go out and find some kind of happiness, even if it doesn't fill the void completely like her. I told her I know exactly where we both can get 100% happiness, but she is not ready. She didn't say anything. I also mentioned that I know her drought ended tonight, she tried to avoid it but then admitted it. We went to sleep.

next week OM is going to leave for about 10 days. she told me this morning that we can do more things together soon. I told her "wow, I feel special. I finally get some time with you. but as soon as OM gets back, we will go back to the same." she said that she hangs out with me and we do things, I said yes but you spend 60 to 70 hours a week out of the house (and yes a lot of it is school related, but most of it is with him). I just said I am going to enjoy the time I will spend with her. I also said I am going to be happy again one day, and if people want to be a part of it that's great, if not it's their loss.

I still want to give up, but I will hang in there.

BM07, once the A is out in the open things will change. Once my W's A was out she started to see things in OM she didn't notice before. Things are not great, but at least things are out in the open and we can move forward from a place of honesty. Just DB like crazy and have patience (easier said than done). I hope you are right about R with OM breaking apart (because I don't see it like that, but sometimes someone on the outside sees things clearer than someone in the sitch)

take care