Okay, I was reading through the Judgment again and it specifically states that me, the respondent, filed her Entry of Appearance, Waiver and Consent. I don't think that the Judgment is good without that Waiver. Oh well, I am going to follow the plan...send the signed Judgment and 2 year waiver. I will worry about the rest after that...both attorneys that I talked to warned me about signing the Waiver without referring to the Judgment.
I found a template for the Entry of Appearance Waiver and Consent for Illinois on the internet. The one that I got from H's attorney is identical but it missing the whole section stating..."I further certify that I am aware that property owned by myself and Plaintiff may be classified as marital or non-marital property, and I am aware that marital misconduct does not enter into a judicial division of said property. I waive any right that I have to all of said property other than that which will be awarded to me in accordance with the terms of the order for Judgment of Dissolution of Marriage." Isn't it strange that it is missing this section. I just can't sign it like it is.
Go with your gut. If it is telling you not to sign one of the doc's then do not sign it until your comfortable with it. Remember this is what your H's L is putting in front of you. You have no reason to trust either of them at this point.
I signed the papers. However, I am not going to mail them until tomorrow. I am still waiting on a copy of H's divorce petition from his attorney. If I don't get it by tomorrow, I am still going to mail the papers, since I told H I was done with them (not rocking the boat). The Judgment is fine and they produced the Judgment from the Petition.
My gut told me not to sign the Entry of Appearance, Waiver, & Consent, so I didn't. I requested that his attorney send me a new form with the additional wording referencing the Judgment. This may hold up the process a little, but I really think that some standard text was missing on the form that I had, and I wasn't comfortable signing it as it was. It needed be notarized and it seems that any form that has to be notarized has a lot of power. If the attorney fixes it, I will sign it.
I'm doing okay. I thought signing the papers would be harder than it was. At this point in my sitch, I need the closure. I need to move on with my life. Most of me is scared and sad, but a little piece of me is looking forward to what is in store for me in the future. Life goes on...
M:28, D finalized: 8/28/07 Current Thread
"When life gives you a hundred reasons to cry, show life that you have a thousand reasons to smile."
I just googled the title and found a different template, without the wording you mention.
I think the missing wording is not important. If it is modified, you are simply stating a better understanding of the process than you would be signing the current version.
Okay, so maybe the version that I have is ok. I still think that I am going to mail the other papers. Both attorneys that I consulted thought that language should be in there. I found the explanation below of the form. It seems very powerful.
The Entry of Appearance, Waiver, and Consent form, while short and simple, is very powerful and by signing it, you essentially gave up a lot of your rights. To understand what rights you gave up, you need to look at each part of the form separately. By filing your "Entry of Appearance" you told the court that you were not going to have an attorney represent you and you gave the court jurisdiction (power) to decide the case and divide your property and debts. By filing the "Waiver" you told the court that you waived your right to be served with a Summons and a copy of your ex-husband's divorce petition by the Sheriff. This allowed your ex-husband to proceed with a hearing because the judge knew that you knew that the lawsuit had been filed against you. The "Consent," however, is the most important part of the form. By filing the "Consent," you told the court that you agreed with everything that was in your ex-husband's divorce petition. This allowed the judge to basically give your ex-husband everything he had requested without your presence at a hearing.
Odd that there is only one form for all three of these things. I overanalyze everything, so I probably would be fine signing, but I'm going with the attorney and my gut. I never did receive H's divorce petition.
M:28, D finalized: 8/28/07 Current Thread
"When life gives you a hundred reasons to cry, show life that you have a thousand reasons to smile."
OK, entry of appearance is no big deal because you do not intend to have a lawyer represent you.
The waiver of summons is OK if you have received a copy of your H's petition. But you haven't.
The "consent" part is sort of necessary if his L wants to be able to file the proposed Judgement without you there. The judge or the court doesn't make this stuff up on their own; one of the attornies writes up the order based on the agreement, and the judge just signs it. If there is a dispute, then the judge makes a ruling and then the attorney has to modify the judgement and re-submit it.
That being the case, it is certainly possible that the judge would modify the judgement, based on oral argument from H's L, and that would be legally binding to you.
Bottom line, I wouldn't sign that paper at this point. Again, since you are representing yourself, you can phone or meet with his L directly to iron this out. It seems like it would be best for them to go ahead and file the petition first. That's just bullshit that you haven't seen it.
Thanks again Mike. I agree that they should have provided me with his Divorce Petition if they want me to sign a Form that says that I agree with it. Maybe I'll get it in the mail today, if not at least I didn't mail back a form that says that I received it and agree with it. His attorney will need to decide if he wants to provide me with an updated Form or follow the standard procedure with filing first rather than this package deal. These are small town attorneys and all three practice in different counties, so I received a little bit different answers from all of them. I believe that everything is probably okay, but I have to watch my back because no one's watching it for me...and like I said earlier...I overanalyze everything...maybe has something to do with being an actuary. I'm treading in dangerous waters...I don't want to upset H but I don't want to let something slide that shouldn't and get hurt from the legal side.
M:28, D finalized: 8/28/07 Current Thread
"When life gives you a hundred reasons to cry, show life that you have a thousand reasons to smile."
I've been out GALing and haven't had a chance to add an update on my sitch. I signed the D papers and mailed them off yesterday. I received a copy of H's divorce petition, but still didn't feel comfortable signing the Entry of Appearance, Consent, & Waiver Form because the D petition states the court will divide the assets equitably...no mention of the judgment, so I put a cover letter with the forms requesting that H's attorney send me a new Form referring to the Judgment. We will see how that goes.
I haven't heard from H which is usually a good thing. I came to find out that last weekend he brought OW around to his brothers to introduce her. He actually even brought her to see my godchild who is 6 years old...apparently now since he gave me the updated D papers, he thinks its ok to drag her around everywhere. It's unbelievable that society is ok with this sort of charade but apparently they are...my bil response was what was I supposed to do? I said say wth are you doing, you are still married and I don't want my child to be exposed to this. I give up...my H has no morals left. He left me for this conniving, manipulative homewrecker. She won...she can have him...I'm moving on to bigger and better things. My sil is afraid he is going to marry her just to "show" everyone. If he does that, the one that is going to pay the ultimate price is him.
Other than mailing the D papers, I had a good weekend. I went out with friends on Friday night, went boating with my bil and sil and their families yesterday, and went to a waterpark today. I've been keeping busy. Work is going good but busy. I got a great raise after passing my test, so financially things should be a little easier on me. I'm going to Chicago for a mini-vacation next week, so that should be fun. I've been never downtown before just to the northern suburbs.
I don't know how long it will take to get the D finalized but I'm guessing 2 months or so. I think that I will be ready to start dating by then. My counselor doesn't want me to get into a relationship for 6 mos. but she thought casual dating would be ok.
I got my first wedding invitation that was addressed to only me. It said xxxx and guest. It is one of my friends from high school. I probably should go, but I will have to get up enough courage to go by myself. I have a few weeks to decide.
Sorry this is so long...just had a lot to say.
M:28, D finalized: 8/28/07 Current Thread
"When life gives you a hundred reasons to cry, show life that you have a thousand reasons to smile."
Sounds to me like you are doing great. Keep it up you have your whole life to look forward to. No use letting your letting your inept STBXH drag you down or hold you back.
Quote:
It's unbelievable that society is ok with this sort of charade but apparently they are...my bil response was what was I supposed to do?
I understand the frustration of knowing that others are accepting of our S's behavior. You would have thought that your bil would have told his brother no she is not welcome until after the D. I do not want my child being exposed to all of this nonsense. Or even a no she is not welcome and never will be. Are you crazy or just out of your mind for leaving Hope?
Good for you on your Mini-Vaca, there is a lot to do here and see in Chicago. If you make it to the Sears Tower look me up I'll buy you lunch. BTW, they are currently filming the next Batman movie across the street, you never know who you might see. I guess the guy that is playing Joker in the next movie was seen skateboarding near the set while dressed as the Joker.
It all started with president Clinton. Not saying he is any diferant than any other president.and not saying that Bush's policys are any better But.... Clinton's affair seemed to be accetable.
Husband
And if I claim to be a wise man, well It surely means that I don't know
