Newcomer in Pain

[GainingStrength]

I'm a newcomer who has been inspired by Michele's books and the posts I've read. I'm writing because I'm in such pain that I don't know if I can keep on DBing. My wife says that I haven't been meeting her emotional needs for years, that our age difference has become too great, and btw she has started a 'friendship' with someone else (he is 38, never been married).
She just now called me to discuss our financial and child custody arrangements. She is so intent on getting me out of her life so that she can start her new life that it is ripping me apart! I have been near perfect in following all of the programs in the Divorce Remdedy, but I don't know how much longer I can keep it up. I would appreciate any advice and/or support.

Me - 63
W - 40
married - 13 April 91
two children: girl 8, boy 14
bomb - (said she wanted divorce) - 6 July 07
separated - 13 July 07 (I still have my office in the home but am sleeping in our travel trailer parked in our sideyard)
1st appointment with mediator - 23 July 07
divorce papers about to be filed
She is the exec director of a non-profit; I am a self-employed consultant