And exactly how does speaking WOA to a 47 year old women in menopause give here a sex drive? That seems like a pretty huge leap of faith.
I think you are looking at this all wrong. You really need to put yourself into her frame of mind. The WOA are not intended to trigger a sex drive. The WOA are intended to be comforting to her and in that way allow her to relax and soften her defenses. Only after those defenses are softened and she feels safe will she have the ears to hear your concerns and the eyes to see those concerns from your POV.
In fact, giving her WOA has nothing to do with doing the right thing, IMO. If the thing that would validate her is for you to stick a needle in her eye, then I say do it (ok, maybe bad example). But is that the right thing? To me, the objective is to find a way to grow to a better point in the relationship. Doing the right thing for one person may be the wrong thing for the spouse.
You want to get a response, to lower defenses, to begin a dialogue to investigate the problems and then solve them. That will build an emotional connect which will translate into safety for her. Only then will any sex drive start to emerge. Doing the right thing may or may not accomplish this. Be pragmatic. Stop trying to find a one-to-one connection between some action and the triggering of her sex drive. Things are way more complicated that such a simplistic model. CeMar, start thinking on a higher level.
