Kicking him off the fence

[ourcrisis]

LO, haven't posted for a while. Been busy on all fronts.
Your H talks like mine. From what I guess from your h saying he wished A never happened.... he is starting to realize he did something wrong. This is a step forward. In the beginning, he is ALL CORRECT in leaving you and loving OW (because of whatever reason he deems fit). Now, I am guessing he is starting to wake up. Granted, he still have strong feelings for OW (his fault to put HER into all these misery of D, etc.) No, he is not over her yet, long way from that. However, do you sense he is starting to feel a bit guilty towards you also? That he did not show before?

My H went through the same path. For a while after he started to "wake up", he felt sorry for OW, hoping she would just find another guy and live happily ever after.... (this is when he told me he was still deciding between OW and family, but moving towards family, lots of back and forth then).

I am guessing, if your h is like my h, he is slowing waking up. He is starting to realize that these three person R will not work forever. He has to pick one or another.

My humble opinion is to keep on GALing. OW just got divorced, she will be pushing him. Let her do the dirty work of pushing. However, I am not sure about continuing being Stepford wife, or tough love LRT. Tough call.

I can see your H is following a path similar to mine. So you actually have a good chance. Hang in there. Hugs.