woah! OT... if Nikki wasn't graphic enough, you definitely didn't leave anything behind! ;\) lol you know, I think you do have something about the, asking H to help her with the "O". Last year, I was tired of being so embarrassed w/ myself so I became a lot less inhibited. Did a little lap dance once, (very quick though) and would "you know what" by myself right beside him and definitely let him know it. He actually thought that was really cool and even told some of his friends- which I was totally embarrassed!

Although... Nikki, your H could just be in a different spot right now. I think that it is possible that he may feel inadequate and doesn't want to "embarass" himself. But have you noticed any erection problems before?

I know my H had turned me down before last year but it was because he didn't think it was fair to me (rather i believe he was thinking it wasn't fair to OW) but he never just flat turned me down, it was more like, "you don't need to do that"or "you shouldn't do that". not "leave me alone". Maybe there is still some depression problem too.

Would it hurt to just come right out and ask if he feels uncomfortable with you initiating? Otherwise we are all just guessing. I say to try an be an "animal" as OT put it, a couple times and if he rejects both, then ask him about it.

Me 33 H 34 S9 S3
M 6 yrs (2gether 11 yrs)
EA/PA 1/2006
DB 5/2006
H wants D 6/2006
H wants ME 8/2006
H "said" PA/EA over 8/2006
H erased OW off phone! 2/2007

"It is far better 2 choose humility & change oneself, than 2 wait in vain trying 2 chang someone else."