HW what attracts us when we are younger, as opposed to what attracts us when we are older (as you are well aware) are MUCH different Yes, people change as they age, but how much different still works?
That is the one of the major problems with a lot of the people on this board. They want things to "be the way they were" - Cemar wants things the way they were.
I want a scaled down version of "some things the things" the way they were. I want W. I want to be a H. I don't want to be the pet’s daddy or Mr. fix-it as my main function in the R.
I did that with kids, which I gladly filled that role. I am flexible enough when it comes to real issues. When it comes to entitlement or someone not trying, sorry, that grates me in a bad way.
I see myself as being too flexible sometimes and I think that just confirms BB's thoughts that a W need to do what makes her happy.
After doing several things to improve our R, I am sort of giving up on BB ever doing or liking much of what I think would be a close/emotionally connected marital R. She has her pets that have come first ( sort of like a 3rd party) for so long and has turned down social activities to be mommy to the pets, too hot, too windy, they are not our type, she is tired, etc.
I was hoping (life perspective) the R would have been us at first, then kids/us, then no kids/some pets, and then mostly us.
I even worked on a trip to Alaska. BB was OK till she insisted on a kennel with Internet connection and web cameras in the kennel area, so she could check on the 6 pets, another $900 for a 10-day trip.
BTW it has been 104f to 109f here for the last 2 weeks. Today it is only 68f this AM. With the high temps not much happens physically between us. I would but BB has her problems with the heat. Half the house has A/C and we have multiple fans in most rooms. BB doesn’t go out of the house much. I make my usual deliveries and repair calls. More 100’s on the way.
Oh well time for more GAL, solo activities, which I am doing, very slowly.
