When you hired your lawyer, you told her you wanted to slow this thing down. If you are now ready for it to proceed, you need to tell her that.
It's a common problem in households with a major and minor breadwinner--the lesser earner always thinks the 2nd paycheck is theirs alone, but the primary paycheck is 50/50. Where is the logic in that??
As for the cars, offer to sell both of them, pay off both loans from the proceeds, and split the remainder. She won't want to do that. So instead, you subtract the loans from the blue-book price. If you have more equity in your car than she has in hers, split the difference.
As for her checking account, would you be willing to give her half of your balance (as of separation or filing date) in exchange for half of her balance?? If she's been stockpiling money since then, that's because you didn't require her to pay enough of the family expenses--let it go.
Regardless, I think it is time for you to give your proposal (and hers) to your lawyers and let them settle it.
